March Book

For March I decided to read the kind-of-sequel to "The Wednesday Wars" by Gary D. Schmidt, "Okay For Now." Last Spring my reading endorsement class was taught by Brad Wilcox who is literally the best teacher I have ever had and one of the sweetest, most genuine people I know. But anyways, he suggested to my coworkers and I that we read "The Wednesday Wars" because it was written in the voice of a middle schooler and was hilarious and heart felt. I am so glad I read it. Do it. I don't have time to go into details because that's not the book I read this month. But seriously, one of the best books I've ever read. Plus, you should read it before the second one.

"Okay For Now" follows along the same lines as "The Wednesday Wars." It takes one of the supporting characters and gives him his own book. I will say that while I did not like this one as much as the original, it was still the same heart-felt and funny type of book. What I love about these young adult novels though is that they deal with such real-life and deep concepts. The books take place in the 60's. This book specifically deals with the excitement of the moon landing and the devastating aftermath of the Vietnam War. I love that the books are written through the eyes and voice of an 8th grader. Schmidt gets some things so spot on, it's not even funny. He also gets the big moments right too. It's moving to see the way the main character, Doug, deals with the challenges he faces in life at such a young age. And he has no shortage of challenges.

This is an easy read. It's not adult-level fiction. It's meant for middle schoolers, but I don't see anything wrong with reading a young-adult book, especially when it's so well written. It will pull hard on your heart strings. (I cried in both books). It will also make you laugh. And it will make you think harder about certain things. It's a beautiful story about love, loss, learning, growing up, over-coming challenges, conquering anger, forgiving, and moving forward. It's about being who you want to be, and not what your circumstances dictate. It's about changing people's minds and learning to be a good person. I really, really loved it.

I had a tiny problem with the ending, nothing big, just my need for closure. If anyone else has read it and wants to discuss, pleassseee let's do it! I want to hear someone's thoughts, other than my own, on what happened.

All in all. Great book. Great series. Read them both and cry with me.

 

awwww yyeeaaahhh

Today is the first day of Spring Break.

You know what that means??

I shall be spending the next 6 days doing a whole lot of nothing and everything at the same time.

Catch you on the flip side, Sportsfans.

8 months

This whole "I'm gonna have a baby" thing is starting to get very, very real.

• This month started the uncomfortableness that I was told about. The achy hips times ten. Leg and foot cramps. Back pain that doesn't go away. Baby feet in my ribs. Nerve pain in my tailbone. Trouble breathing. I feel VERY pregnant. But I like it! While these things are inconvenient and certainly no picnic, it's fun to feel pregnant and to know it's getting closer! The more uncomfortable I get, the closer baby gets. So bring on the uncomfortableness!
• Bending over is near impossible. When I do have to do it, I can feel my organs smooshing. Gross, right?
• She moves so freaking much! It's so weird! I wear a badge around my neck at work that rests on my stomach and more than once, she has kicked me so hard where it hangs that my badge has flown a bit into the air. It's hilarious. I can see her moving all around. She will make my stomach bulge out on one side. We can see where her feet are and head is sometimes. It's so much fun. We will lay in bed and just watch my stomach move. It's the best entertainment. 
• The movement is way different than before. While she still kicks sometimes, it's more that I can feel her move. I feel her roll around and all kinds of stuff. I love it.
• I want candy all the time. Candy bars. I love candy bars.
• I can't sit very long. 20 minutes max and then I need to stand. But then I can only stand for 20 minutes too. I need to constantly be changing positions.
• I love when people ask me how long until I'm due and I can say 8 weeks. THAT'S NOTHING!!!!!
• My limbs and butt fall asleep within minutes.
• I have been having super weird dreams.
• I dreamt about the baby for the first time two weeks ago. I was jealous of the women who said the dreamt about the baby all the time. I was excited to finally have a dream! Even though it was kinda weird. I was trying to breast feed her but she kept falling asleep. And then I had to go pump and teach my dad how to feed her because he was going to be my nanny and I was going back to work.
• Speaking of pee. I do that a lot.
• I'm always thirsty. Which is good because I need a lot of water. But then.. I pee more.
• I can't jog anymore. I was doing very light jogging up until a month and a half ago. Now it's terrible. I feel all my insides go up and then back down and all land on my bladder which of course makes me want to pee. I'll stick to walking from here on out.
• No stretch marks yet. Occasional swelling in my hands and feet. It comes and goes and it's never very bad.
• I remember back a few months people telling me any time I said I was hot that it was because of the baby. That wasn't really true until this month. Back then, I was just hot because I was hot. Nowadays.. I am ALWAYS hot. We have been sleeping with the air conditioning on for weeks and I feel bad for Nathan but even with the AC blasting at night I still wake up sweating. He carries our little portable heater around with him. So very thankful I will have this baby before it gets too hot!
• The hormones of the first trimester are back. I cry at the end of basically every TV show I watch. I am also really impatient and snappy.
• It's so hard to get up! Especially getting out of bed. I have to kinda roll myself over. It's funny.
• I have terrible congestion that I am told will last until the baby comes. I am a nose spray addict and I don't even care! The other night I couldn't find the nose spray before bed and I told Nathan that I would literally die right there right then if we didn't find it. Pregnancy might make me a little dramatic.
• My favorite thing in the world is when strangers ask me my due date or congratulate me. It sounds dumb I know but I swear I'm not just an attention whore. It just makes it all seem more real and exciting! I had people tell me that strangers, as well as friends and family, would be making super rude comments all the time. But I haven't encountered that at all yet. Knock on wood.
• I haven't had strangers rub my belly. People always ask me if I have. I have had people I know rub my belly, but to be honest, it doesn't freak me out. One time a former student saw me in the hall and rubbed my belly and THAT freaked me out. Sorry 9th grade boy, but you are not allowed to touch me.
• I am all approved for my maternity leave! It wasn't very hard considering I am due 2 weeks before the school year ends. I want to stay as long as I can so my students' education doesn't depend on some substitute I don't know. My last day of work will be the 17th. Unless she decides to surprise us early!
• Nursery is almost done. All the furniture is set up, it just needs some decorating, which is the best part!!

We are counting down the days and ripping the links off our paper chain. So excited for this little girl to get here!!

what would the students do if I just closed my eyes and took a nap?

I think the Heavens must have known I would be nearing a mental break down at work this week so they made sure that Spring Break would start on Thursday. Today went something like this.

I left on time for work, yet was 10 minutes late.

Thank you traffic jam that turned my 30 minute commute into an over an hour long one!

10 minutes late at work isn't a big deal at most jobs. But when you have a classroom full of 8th graders waiting for you, it's kind of a big deal. Luckily a coworker covered my first few minutes.

Right a first period ends I notice a voicemail on my work phone. I won't go into details about this but basically this voicemail accused me of many things outside my control and the next 3 hours were spent dealing with this mess.

My students were snippy and hormonal today. My patience was already thin. I almost yelled at them all to shut up when they were bickering about stupid things instead of working. Stop being teenagers guys!

They are getting so much busy work from other teachers. Which means my time is spent helping them do said busy work. WHY WHY WHY do teachers assign worksheet after worksheet with no real instruction in between? Excuse me while I stand on my soapbox: WORKSHEETS DON'T TEACH CHILDREN. TEACHERS TEACH CHILDREN. IF YOU DON'T WANT TO TEACH, THEN DON'T BE A TEACHER. Okay, done.

Pregnancy brain is in full force. I had a student give me work for his history class. And then.. I lost it. You guys, I don't lose anything! I am know around these parts (and in my own apartment too) for my OCD organization! I can't find these papers for the life of me. I had to go to my coworker, explain it to him, and beg him to give the kid credit even without the actual assignments. Luckily, he trusts me.

Grades are due for 3rd quarter today. This is happy because I am all caught up on grading and that means that it's almost time for the last quarter of the year! But I printed and wasted tons of ink on 2nd quarter's grades. Come on, Kaitlin.

I have 3 papers due in my endorsement class tonight. Guess how many I had done as of this morning? ZERO. I had a very busy lunch period.

A student asked me if he had enough paragraphs in his essay. I asked if he had 5. He said he didn't know. I told him to count them. He got super annoyed that he had to count how many paragraphs there were instead of me walking over to his desk to count. For the record, he only had 3.

Because I was having an off day, I thought I deserved a candy bar. So I ate one. Then I felt guilty for letting myself have food as a reward. Then I told myself to shut up. Then I felt a little bit sick to my stomach from eating said candy bar.

Yesterday I was at work from 7am-6pm. I only get paid to be there from 7:30-3:30. Gotta love being on salary and contracted hours!

Tomorrow is the last day of the quarter. A student seriously asked me today how he could raise his 46% in science to a B. And he was serious. And when I told him it was impossible, he got mad.

Spring break starts Thursday and runs until Wednesday. It could not be more needed. Nathan is taking off two of those days to have a mini staycation at home with me. It will be the celebration of our 1 year anniversary and enjoying time just us two before the baby. I could not be more excited!! We originally were going to go out of town but decided the gas, hotel, and food money could be spent on more fun things by just staying at home! Ohhh I need this vacation. I am such a whiner.

Speaking of work and my husband. My husband came to work the other day! He needed to do community service hours for a class he is taking. So he did them in my room. It was so fun for him to meet my kiddies and for him to do stuff for me that I didn't want to do. He did fluency timings on alllll my kids. He cleaned the desks. He scraped gum off the desks. He entered grades. He organized files. It was awesome. Plus, I got to spend the whole day with my sweet husband. Including lunch at In-N-Out. Ohhhh my gosh I love food so much.

So there's a positive ending to this not-so-positive post. Now go and eat a candy bar.

Things my students say

Guys, it's been forever since I did one of these posts. I was so good at doing them once a month during my first year of teaching. I think this is my second one all school year this time around. Oopsie. Anyway. Enjoy my students!

a student was turned around talking to someone realized I was staring at him
CE: I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
RB: It's amazing that she can get you to apologize by just staring at you.
CE: It's because she has this nice face but her eyes can be so mean!

CK: When are the announcements coming on?
PW: We already heard the announcements. Where have you been?
CK: I've been in AMERICA, okay buddy?! Where have you been?

MD: Are you going to hit a pinata?
Me: When?
MD: Just like after school or something.
Me: No..
MD: Okay, just wondering.

AS: How much money do you think an Eagle's skeleton would be worth?

CK: Mrs. Merkley don't ever go into my chicken coop with sandals on. They will peck at your feet! I just wanna yell, "They aren't worms!"
Me: Why would I ever go inside your chicken coop?
CK: In case you like.. run out of eggs.

SW: I believe in cell phones in school the way that Cher believes in life after love.
This was the closing argument to a persuasive essay on cellphones in school..

LV: I don't even know why we have Valentine's day. It's like everyone wants to celebrate how miserable I am.

CW: Mrs. Merkley I have a question, but don't come over here for a minute.
Me: Why?
CW: Because I just farted.

CE: How big is your baby now?
Me: Like the size of a big cucumber.
CE: Okay... sorry. I'm just having a really hard time picturing a cucumber in your stomach. Give me a minute.

Me: How many of you have heard the word "suburb"?
CK: Yeah, it's like a car.
Me: No, not a suburban.
ZG: Like a subaru?
Me: No it's not a car.
ZG: A subaru is too a car!
Me: No, I know a subaru is a car, but a suburb is not a car.
MD: What's a suburb?
CK: It's pronounced suburban.

ZG: The hardest thing I have ever had to go through in life is learning how to say the word "symanim" correctly.
Me: You mean "synonym"?
ZG: DANGIT!!

AD: Can I borrow a black highlighter?
Me: I don't have a black highlighter. That would just black out the words.
AD: No like a clear, black highlighter.
Me: So.. it is clear.. or is it black?
AD: .. I don't know.

JM: Dude, shut up!
Me: Jose that's super rude. You don't talk to your peers like that.
JM: Sorry, sorry, shut up please.

CK: Even if my mom called the cops on me, I would never call her a butthole.

JM: I used to kiss my dad when I was little. I don't like to think about that.

IH: Do not depart apart a man from is gum unless the man says.

Me: Do you guys feel more confident using the correct form of "there" now?
CO: I feel almost too confident about my "theres"
Me: How can you be too confident?
CO: I am just going to start throwing theres all over the place! Here's a there! There's a there! Woah that was two theres! See how confident I am?!

This is one of my all time favorite stories. Maybe you had to be there, but I was laughing so hard I cried. One day in class, my student's were with partners and were working on writing strong introductions for persuasive essays. They just had to write one paragraph on a mini poster and be prepared to share their paragraph with the class. A student brought his up to turn in. The conversation then went like this..
Me: Before you turn it in, you have to go over it in marker.
ZG: What?! I have to go over it in marker?!
Me: Yeah. That's what everyone is doing so it looks nice.
ZG: How will it look nicer!? What was the point of even writing it if I have to go over it in marker?!
At this point I was super confused as to why he was so upset over simply tracing his letters with marker. I just told him to follow directions and return to his seat. A few seconds later, I hear his partner yelling, "No Zach!!!!! Not like that!!!!!!!!" Sweet little Zach thought I meant he had to scribble over the paragraph in marker. As soon as he realized what he did he joined in on the laughing. They just re-wrote it underneath. Here's what his paper looked like. Please feel free to read the introduction below it and try to guess why we are still working on essays even though we started the unit 3 months ago. Gotta love Resource :)

I blacked out the last names, but I did not add the yolo.

Weekend/Instagram overload!

This weekend was awesome, Sportsfans.

It was the kind of weekend where you do nothing, but don't feel lazy.

The kind of weekend that doesn't move too fast.

The kind of weekend where you eat a lot. (every weekend)

It started out with an awesome day at work on Friday. The last few weeks we have been slamming our kids hard to get them ready for the big district writing assessment. On my team, there is me and another language arts teachers (she takes the gen ed kids), a science teacher and a history teacher. Our kids were writing essays in all of our classes. They did amazing on the test and we wanted to reward them so instead of teaching that day, they moved around in groups to different activities. It was so fun. We played Mafia in one room, ping pong using text books as paddles in another room, and since it was a gorgeous day, the third group played kickball. We decided I wouldn't host an activity and instead, follow my kids around to monitor their behavior. It was a blast and I think we all needed it.

 

That night Nathan and I took advantage of some gift cards and went out to eat. I wont these at work. My boss sends out weekly emails so we don't have to have too many staff meetings. At the end she will ask questions and the first to email back with the correct answers wins gift cards. Let's just say, I'm pretty smart. It was funny too because we ran into my aunt and uncle while there. They live in Bountiful so it was funny to bump into them at a Salt Lake restaurant. It was great to see them!

 

Saturday we enjoyed the weather some more and ate at Great Harvest out in the sunshine. Their bread makes me want to die over and over again.

 

We ran some errands, went to the adult session of Stake Conference, and then I indulged in this. I really, really love them you guys.

 

Sunday was basically the definition of lazy-magnificence.We had a green breakfast to celebrate St. Patty's. Then Stake Conference. Then.. nothing. Ahh, sweet nothing. We laid in bed, took some naps, watched some TV. It was fantastic.

Whipped out the crock pot for a pork-chop dinner, and then I did something naughty. Well, Nathan did something naughty first! He bought the Cadbury mini eggs. But I looked up the recipe for the Cadbury mini egg blondies. It's the naughtiest and most wonderful recipe to have ever been pinned on my pinterest board. You guys, they were so delicious!! Someone come to my house and eat all the leftovers. I can only use the "it's for the baby" excuse for so long. And I think it wore off after we ate half the pan last night.

We concluded the night by watching Perks of Being a Wallflower which I have mixed feelings about but don't really feel like typing those out. Instead I will end with some pictures just in case you thought your nephews were cuter than mine.

Here is Clarky winking.
Best wink EVER.
And here is Carson just basically
being a G.
I love those boys.
I love their siblings too, of course.

But these pictures needed to be
shared on the interwebs.

mid-week ramblings

I am 30 weeks pregnant today. For some reason 30 seems like such a HUGE milestone. It's the home stretch. 10 more weeks. That seems like nothing. I couldn't go to the doctor until I was 10 weeks along and that was just a little blip. Can't believe she is going to here so soon!

28 weeks at my parent's house

It's amazing how the happiness and warmth of Spring can make you forget how terrible Winter was. I am already wondering why I thought it was so bad. NOTE TO SELF: WINTER STILL SUCKS. January was terrible! I won't let Spring blind me into believing Winter isn't the worst thing to happen to the Earth.

We made paper chains in my home room class. We went all elementary school! But it's exciting how few rings there are on those chains.

Today we had an early morning assembly. It was the school talent show. I always get nervous for this assembly. Last year was pretty rough. This year was actually pretty amazing! There were a few rough acts, but we have some amazing singers and dancers at this school. And only ONE piano act. There are usually 17.

My home room kiddos are kinda being angels right now. Who says you can't get a room of 20 ADHD boys and 7 well-behaved girls to be dead silent for 30 minutes? Work days are my favorite.

I am so unmotivated at work. I love teaching and lesson planning, but all the paperwork and schedule changes and parent phone calls and testing.. I have to force myself to do them and I am always waiting until the last minute. That whole "getting to work on time" thing is getting difficult. It doesn't help that I am not coming back next year and my boss knows it. She loves me so I don't need to gain her approval. And even if she didn't love me.. well I am quitting anyways!

Speaking of that, I also just had my last JPASS ever!!! It's our school district's formal evaluation. It's intense. But I got "highly effective" in all categories again which is the highest rating you can get. My principal told me that based on my observations, I should teach a class on behavior management and that was probably the best compliment she could give me. I studied behavior management like crazy in college because it fascinated me so much. After my behavior management course, I TAed for that professor twice. I love being good at what I love to do and what I worked so hard for for so many years. I love teaching and I will miss teaching in a formal setting so much!

I am so ready for Nathan to be done with this semester. This semester sucks. He has so much homework and is at school so late! Some nights he is gone from 730am-10pm. Poor boy. He works so hard.

Nathan always wants spaghetti these days. Even on those ate nights when he isn't home until 10, he will text me and ask for spaghetti. So he is chowing down on it at 1030 at night. So weird.

You guys. I love the Bachelor so much and I fall for it every time. I knew at the beginning of the season who was going to win. I can't help it!! I always read the spoilers. But I was mad when I first found out. Catherine hardly ever even talked. She seemed weird. I wanted Des to win. Then the season went on and I fell in love with her! I was so excited for the finale. I loved them together. And you bet your butt I cried. I like to believe they will last. But these bachelors and bachelorettes always break my heart! Also, sweetest proposal on the show so far and most genuine and cute acceptance. Also also, Lyndsey handled things like a freaking champ. Talk about being the bigger person. She was so sweet and supportive. Unlike some of the other ladies who left the season. *coughashleeiscrazycough*

Um.. what am I going to watch on Monday nights now?

So warm weather, right? It's the bomb. I started going back to Liberty Park which is where I have always ran in the past. When I first got pregnant, I went there every day after work until it got too dang cold. It's so fun to be back! Except I definitely can't run anymore. Or jog. It's just a waddle.

I don't think I ever feel like I don't have to pee. Does that make sense? I will pee and leave the bathroom and already feel like I have to pee again. It's this sick, twisted, magic trick.

Nathan and I eat grapes so fast. It's ridiculous. Especially since the ain't cheap these days. We have gone through 3 giant bags of grapes since Saturday. They're like nature's candy!!

We've been doing a lot of work with commonly confused words in my Language Arts class. This week it's been their, there, and they're. I told them one time while dating a boy, he texted me using the wrong form of "there" and I immediately didn't want to date him anymore. They all freaked out and now I have a few boys worried that they will get dumped over their grammar.

All I want for lunch is a Twix.

Over the weekend

This weekend was so much fun! You might think I am lame after you find out what we did, but it was awesome.

Friday night we ordered pizza, watched Friends, and put the crib together!!!!

Okay so Nathan put the crib together. But one time I held a piece while he put a screw in.

He also set up the stroller and car seat. This was much easier than the crib.

I spent the night washing and sorting all those clothes we have for the little lady so far. We are big baby nerds. But it was so exciting to get things started in her room!

Saturday carried on in the same fashion. Slept in then ran a billion errands. First stop: The DI.

You guys, the DI is the best place in the world for baby clothes. I have raided it a few times before. Babies only wear their outfits a few times tops before they grow out of them, so the baby clothes at the DI look brand new. Some still have tags on them! And they cost a dollar! Sometimes less. We bought our little girl 30 new outfits for $20. I kid you not. All for newborn to 12 months. She will be so stylish in her DI clothes. I am not even ashamed though. Why go to baby gap and spend $40 on a outfit that I just got for $1? Cheap and ghetto is the way to be!

Then we took our recently discovered left-over wedding gift cards to Bed, Bath, and Beyond and re-did our entire bathroom for free. That's the best feeling in the world! I love gift cards. Now that we have 2 bathrooms, we moved our old stuff into the guest bathroom and now our master bathroom is probably my favorite place in the world! I will post pictures when we finally get the whole apartment done. Which should be soon!

Next stop, Zupas and TCBY. Because, duh.

Last stop was Wallmart for groceries and more furniture. We got new bookshelves for our living room, a book shelf for baby's room, and a stand for Nathan to put his recording equipment on. Then we came home, Nathan built everything while I washed all our new merchandise, decorated the bathrooms, and sorted baby's new clothes! Her dresser is on it's way to us and soon her room will be ready! Ahhhhhhhhhh!

Then I made Nathan hang all our pictures and decorations. After 3 weeks of being in our new place, it's finally feeling like home.

So that was our super fun weekend!

Told you you would think I was lame.

But I don't even care. Because my apartment and nursery are almost all set up and my husband is really cute!

So hurry up May 22nd! We are ready for you!
Also, Nathan made me do a photoshoot with the crib. I will spare you most of the awesome shots.
Also also, our apartment was a mess. Promise it's better now. Kinda.

So hurry up May 22! We are ready for you!

breaking the habit

Every week in my Language Arts class, I put a new quote up on the board and we take the first 10 minutes of every Monday to discuss it, then focus on it the rest of the week. This Aristotle quote (you should have heard how some of my students pronounced his name) is the quote this week. This morning during our discussion, I found it so applicable to my life that we ended up discussing this quote over half the period. My students had great insight, and this is definitely the thought I am taking with me this week as I rearrange some priorities in my life and make some new habits.

I have two major addictions in my life that need to be broken like, yesterday. Facebook and my iPhone. Sadly, the two go hand-in-hand making it even harder. I spend so much time mindlessly scrolling Facebook. It's ridiculous!! I am lucky to not get caught up in the big comparing game that I know is a struggle. I don't get on and compare my life to others. So what am I even doing on there? NOTHING. Like.. seriously. Nothing. Just looking at my newsfeed. And thinking, "Hmm.. I haven't stalked that person in a while." So I go through their pictures. And their profile leads me to someone else. Then I'm liking and commenting and blah, blah, blah. I feel the need to know what is going on in everyone's lives. How lame is that? Why should I care so much? It's just like my terrible celebrity gossip habit that I have luckily tamed in recent months. Why do the details of everyone's lives matter so much? Shouldn't I be focusing on the things that really matter? But there I sit- scrolling and scrolling and scrolling and getting nothing done. It's been especially hard since I got married because Nathan goes to school at night. When he's home, I don't feel the need to be on Facebook. But when he's gone, I get bored and fill my time with mindless stalking instead of doing things that could actually benefit me and my life.

The phone goes right along with that. Guys, smart phones are the most wonderfully horrible invention ever. They can do so much!! They can do too much. Facebook would be an easier habit to break if I didn't carry it around with me all day. But it's not just Facebook when it comes to my phone. I feel the need to constantly be on it if there is ever a down second. Pinterest, Instagram, email, games, text messaging.. I don't consider those addictions but I do them when there's nothing else to do because I seem to constantly need to be entertained. I am always on my phone. And I feel naked and lost without it. It's just sad. I don't want to be so pathetic that as soon as a commercial comes on during a TV show that I have to get out my phone so I'm not "bored." I don't want to be checking Instagram in the elevator so I never speak to any of my neighbors. I don't want to feel the need to run back out to my car in the middle of the work day because I forgot my phone. I am a pathetic ball of patheticness.

I am technology and Facebook addicted. Admitting it is the first step, right? This all just hit home hard the other day when I told Nathan I didn't want out kids to be like my students- technology addicted video-gamers who have to be constantly entertained. See the irony? I did. And it was humbling. My kids will follow my example. If their mom can't go anywhere without her phone and is constantly checking Facebook, they will learn from that.

I don't think all technology and social media is bad. Blogging is a huge stress relief for me and I love that my life is so well documented. Facebook is great for keeping in touch, when done in moderation. Smart phones can be amazing life-savers. Like when you don't know where the nearest Del Taco is. All these things are fantastic inventions. But they need to be used appropriately.

So I started my Facebook once a day rule. Katie Bastian has lovingly decided to join me. It's nice having someone to be accountable to. I started yesterday and it was nice! I checked Facebook before dinner and not once after. Today I haven't checked once. When I get out my phone for some mindless entertainment, I open up my scriptures app and read a few instead of Facebooking or checking my other apps. I am keeping my phone in my desk all day and not checking just to check. Eventually, I'd like to get to the point where I don't check Facebook everyday and I carry my phone with me as a phone, not an entertainment tool. One step at a time :)

Why Work Has Been Making Me Happy Lately..

• The way Cahn (one of my crazy ADHD boys I have taught 2 years in a row now) likes to sing to himself in a southern accent when he works and it actually helps him concentrate.
• The way Kris always smiles no matter what he is talking about.
• The way my sweet, hyperactive, blond twins from last year still visit me and tell me stories in their high-pitched, fast voices. And the fact that even though I am not their teacher this year, I still caught them switching places in their classes. How can no other teacher's tell them apart?!
• Eating lunch with my co-workers.
• My co-workers in general. I am so blessed to be at this school where it feels a lot more like a family than anything else. 
• Having my prep period right before lunch so it feels like I have a really long lunch.
• How excited my students get if I say I need a volunteer to run an errand for me.
• The way CJ always gets in trouble for talking, even though he is usually talking to himself.
• The way Andrew is always confident in the answers he gives, even if they are way off the mark.
• Hearing my kids discuss things like gas prices and hearing how interesting their thoughts on where gas comes from are.
• How if I tell them the baby is making me sick today, they are always very well behaved.
• The fact that I took a sick day last week, and all my coworkers asked how I was feeling when I came back. It's really like a family.
• My carpool of 4 ladies who head out to our endorsement class at BYU every Tuesday night. We may be in way over our heads with this grueling program, but I love our commute together each week.
•  The way my kids think I can't tell when they are eating or texting in class. I usually just make eye contact with them and their cheeks burn up. They think they are so sneaky.
• Quotes like this: "Wow, you are really smart Mrs. Merkley. Way smarter than my mom!"
• After COUNTLESS times of reteaching Chemistry in small groups, seeing it click in their heads and seeing the quiz scored skyrocket.
• Hearing that some of the kids I have this year that I thought hated me with the fire of a thousand suns, nominated me for teacher of the year.
• When I can get my poor, stressed, anxiety-ridden Andru to laugh when he wants to cry about homework instead.
• When they are working on math home work in study skills and ask me if the calculator is correct. 
• When we took our HUGE district essay writing test and I walked around the rows reading their essays over their shoulders and I could see how they are using all the skills and strategies I taught them. I have never been so happy to see transitional phrases! 
• When one of my high-risk kids told me the biggest reason he wouldn't drop out of high school is because he knew it would disappoint me.
• My trouble makers. I have such a soft spot for these guys and this is my second year with them in my class. I love them and the best part is, they love me back. It's been wonderful the past two years with them, watching them grow and learn to trust me. I'll go ahead and toot my own horn, but it's a good feeling to have so much respect from them that when they get into blowups with peers and teachers, or when they run away from school, that I'm one of the only ones they will listen to. I love these guys like my own kids, even if I would have only been 10 when I had them. That's besides the point.
• How helpful some of my boys are. They want to do everything for me. Pass our papers. Pick up papers. Erase the boards. Organize the desks. They are sweethearts. 
• My one, sweet little girl. Yes, one. ONE. I have one female student. The rest are all boys. She is the sweetest and most patient thing in the world. A lot of girls would struggle being the only female in a majority of their classes, but she takes it all in stride and the boys adore her. Although they'd never tell her that.
• The way Christian smiles when he's getting in trouble because he doesn't know how to handle the situation.
• Watching some of my dead-beat kids actually start to care about things. Maybe it's the promise of Spring coming, but something has lit a fire under their butts. And I'm not complaining.
• The way my resource kids and I are kinda like a small and really cool gang. We travel together from class to class and no one messes with my kids when I'm around.

This year has definitely been a challenging one. I thought last year my patience was stretched thin, but I was very wrong as this years it's been stretched an additional 900 million miles. But in the process, my capacity to love has also stretched that far. I have been humbled by these kids and strengthened by these kids and taught many lessons that I was in desperate need to learn. I thought this year was sent to destroy me, but it was in fact sent to make me stronger and prepare me even more to be a mother. I love these kids. I really do. And in all honesty, I couldn't say about all of them a few months ago. (Terrible, right?) I am so glad I can now. I am so glad I get to end the year on such a happy note.

more of my trip home that isn't all emotional

Geeze guys, I didn't just sit around the whole weekend and be emo about my parents moving. I also ate a lot of food and watched murder mystery shows with my parents, okay!!!

I also think it needs to be said that just as much as missing the house I grew up in, I am going to miss Mission Viejo as a whole. Seriously guys, I grew up in paradise. And I loved knowing that when I needed a break from Utah, I could visit paradise for free. Now I will have to get a hotel?! What the heck man. WHAT. THE. HECK.

There are also so many people and places to miss. All of Mission First ward, the greatest ward in the world. All my high school buddies. My neighbor and second mom, Jacqueline. Royal's donuts. I Love Bagels. How about the fact that the beach was just a few minutes away? Gosh, I think Nathan and I will just have to move there. Anyone have millions of dollars to give us?

Anyway. I am super stoked for my parents and super stoked to tour Europe as well. There have been promises made to take me to the Hogwarts castle. Perhaps I'll never come back.

You know how much I love pictures. So here's some pictures from our trip to the beach on my last night. I thought I got a ton of good pictures of my dad and me. Turns out the sun ruined each one. So.. there's that.

Went to the beach. Got pooped on. I think it was the Laguna Beach seagulls way of telling me they are going to miss me. 

That last picture is just to depress me about what my parents are leaving behind for England.

memories from inside

You guys sick of my nostalgic rants about my childhood yet?
Too bad. This is my blog. And they ain't over yet!!!

I was going through old pictures when at home (seriously, these hormones make me so sentimental) and I found a ton of pictures of happy moments in my house. So I am posting them here for my memory's sake. Enjoy if you wish! Seriously guys, it's a lot of pictures. And I went through a super chubby, tomboy stage. It's probably best to avoid it altogether.

 When we first moved there, it was just us 3 girls. We had some good times.

We loved working in the yard with my dad! 

My 9th birthday. One of the MANY giant sleepover birthday parties my mom let me have. So many screaming girls. I have no idea why she let me. Cool story.. I am still good friends with several of these girls.

My best friend and neighbor, Tera. We were inseparable. 

Yes we are wearing Space Jam sweatshirts. This is my cousin Alyssa and I getting ready to go to Portand, OR with our grandparents. We were the favorite grandchildren and always got picked for special trips.

 Making Ffej's hair pretty. His glasses. Oh my gosh I love them.

And then a little baby joined us. And our family was complete!

The fact that I am sharing this picture with you shows you how much I love you.

 This was his first Christmas. He was not even a month old. I remember taking this pictures and thinking my bangs looked really good. They did not.

Here's a slightly better Christmas picture. Check out my butterfly clips! Jealous?

They may have spelled my name wrong.. but this picture represents my soccer days. I loved this sport with all my heart. And then it destroyed my knee. Thanks a lot, soccer.

Tahnee and me caught dancing in my room (before it was orange). This was a regular occurrence  Tahnee and I never spent more than a day apart from 4th grade to 8th grade.

My bright orange and very messy bedroom. And my puppy Dixie.

 Just in case you were doubting my love for Johnny Depp..

More Dixie!! RIP dear, old friend.

Growing up, and probably even more today, I worshipped my older sister. She's the bomb.

Christmas tree pictures. Every. Single. year.

The "pencil game" night. This night was epic. There are also pictures of the now infamous, "Underwear Party." But they will not be posted here. Hahaha

Lord of the Rings Marathons!

My 18th birthday party, right before we all graduated! I had the greatest friends in high school. 

Okay, okay. That's all I will bore you with for now. Just closing this chapter and opening a new one. Exciting and scary. But so fun to look back on the times I had!