1 week left

I want to be better at recording how I am feeling these precious few days leading up to my wedding, but I just never know what to say! I am a lot calmer than I thought I would be. But I was the same way right before Nathan came home from his mission. The craziness didn't set in until I was on my way to see him. I am thinking that drive to the temple might be an interesting one.

I am not nervous. Not at all. I have never been more sure of a decision in my life. Whenever I think about marrying Nathan I get a peaceful, calm, and happy feeling. I'd prefer that to an overly anxious freakout feeling any day. Although there are some nights I lay awake thinking about our future together and I get so giddy I can't fall asleep. I don't mind though.

I think this all stems from the fact that I feel like I've been married to Nathan for a long time. Obviously we don't get all them marriage perks, but committment wise, Nathan and I have been married for years. over 4 years together will do that to you. We've shared money, we've planned for the future, we've taken care of each other, we've spent tons of time with both sides of the family and we've been doing it all since we were 19. When Nathan was on his mission, my mom used to tell people I was married but my husband was on a business trip. Sometimes that's how it felt. I've called his siblings my brothers and sisters for years. We sacrificed a lot at a young age. But we also found what a lot of people have to wait a lot longer for. We've always known this day was coming, so it's no surprise that it's here. But at the same time, it is surprising to finally be at this point. Make sense? Yeah, not to me either.

But I'll take it. The wedding has smoothly molded into place. (No thanks to me at all. I'd die without my mom and older sister). The only things left on our to do list are to move me into the apartment, pack for California, pick up my dress, and get our marriage license. Everything else is done. Seems surreal and seems right. Strange and wonderful mix of emotions.

Who knew that walking into that Haagen Dazs 5 years ago would change my life. Who knew that I would meet my husband at 18, but have to wait to marry him until I was almost 24. It's been a long road leading to this point, but everything about it feels perfect. 1 more week. I could not be happier.