Our Love Story pt11: Saying Goodbye

Previous posts here.

We lived up the last two months together. We got everything he needed and had a few last adventures. Also, this post has a ton of pictures.

One of my favorite nights we ever had together was our last night together in Utah. We were both leaving the next day to spend Christmas with our families and wouldn't be in Utah together again for 2 years. So we took a little trip down memory lane and relieved our last 3 years knowing each and dating in Utah. Most of these pictures will have little significance to the outside observer. But to us, the represent the dating stage of our love story!

We both went home to our families the next day. His in Nevada. Mine in California. I spent a few days with my family then flew out on Christmas night to spend a few days with Nathan and attend his farewell in Nevada. My awesome family came the night before his farewell and it was so fun to have our families meet.

Christmas night!

Before his Farewell.

Our siblings together at the luncheon after the Farewell.

I drove back with my family to California for my cousin's wedding and to celebrate family birthdays after Nathan's farewell. I was able to stay pretty emotionally stable all Christmas break until the night before I was going to fly back to Nevada the second time. I was going to spend a few more days with Nathan and his family, and then we would say goodbye and I would fly back to Utah. I was laying in my bed in my house the night before I was going back to see him and I realized that after I left here, it was time to say goodbye. I wouldn't come back to this house with Nathan for 2 years. After I left my home that next morning, I knew my life was going to be drastically different. I knew I would be drastically different. That's when the tears came and I got a blessing from my dad. I was still a mess as I flew out to Nathan's though. We worked hard to enjoy New Years and the last few days together. There was one night where I couldn't stop crying and then he started crying and so we decided to not even try to sleep and instead to eat peanut butter sandwiches and play video games until we weren't sad anymore.

New Years Eve 2009

I flew back to Utah on Monday, January 4th to start school. The night before we decided to stay in Vegas with Nathan's sister and brother-in-law, Amanda and Brad, so our trip to the airport would be shorter since my flight was ridiculously early. We ate food and hung out with Amanda and Brad until they went to sleep. Because we are idiots, we decided to stay up all night so we wouldn't miss a minute of our time left together. All it really did was make us more emotional and tired. I don't even remember what we did. But at 5am, we were leaving for the airport and I was already crying.

The last picture we took together.

Nathan walked me to security. We kissed and hugged goodbye. He stood and watched as I waited in line. I kept looking back at him and every time my heart would break. I cannot explain the pain I felt that day. It was of course all worth it and I wanted him to go on a mission more than anything, but that doesn't lessen the sting of saying goodbye to the one you love for 2 years. Eck, even just writing about it is making me sick.

I cried on my flight back. Nathan called me when I landed and it made me feel better, but I still couldn't believe I wasn't going to see him again. He was set apart that night, drove out to Utah the next day, and called me before he entered the MTC on Wednesday. And that was it. Boom, bang. He was gone.

To say I was a mess would be an understatement.